10 Tips for Planning Your Honeymoon

Honeymoons are supposed to be these epic, romantic, once in a lifetime trips. But do they have to be? And, more importantly, should they be? Planning your honeymoon on top of planning your wedding is stress enough! So how do we make honeymoon planning better?

Honeymoons can be tricky. There’s a lot of pressure when planning a honeymoon to wow people with your choices. We all want to have an exciting answer when people ask, “Where did you honeymoon?”

For travel bloggers, it can be hard to top all of your past trips with a high expectations honeymoon. For novice travellers, it can be hard to narrow down where to go or break out of the honeymoon bubble of all-inclusive resorts. Everyone struggles with competing priorities, budget constraints and making decisions for this once in a lifetime trip.

I say: Forget what a honeymoon should be and lean into what you actually want to do. For us, we opted for seafood dinners, fall foliage, museums and podcast-fuelled road trips. That’s our definition of an epic honeymoon and I wouldn’t change a thing about it!

Below I’m sharing 10 tips for planning your honeymoon and refocusing the trip on what you two really want.

Don’t go on your honeymoon right away

Traditionally (and in the movies), newlyweds go straight from their wedding to their honeymoon. We’ve all watched the scene where the newly married couple run out under a downpour of rice and cheers into their getaway car and head straight to the airport. And while this may look romantic in the movies, it’s actually not very practical.

Leaving immediately after your wedding to go on your honeymoon means you spend the first few days of your honeymoon exhausted from all of the energy you put into your wedding. It also means you have to stress about travel plans (and covid tests!) while you should be focusing on your wedding party. And it may mean cutting the celebrations short in order to make your flight. Can you imagine missing part of the reception you planned and paid for in order to get to the airport on time?

Plus, there’s all the post-wedding tasks to consider. If you’re away on your honeymoon who is going to dry clean your outfit, return any wedding rentals, write thank you notes, get your deposits back and spend time with out-of-town guests who flew in just for your big day? (The answer is probably “my mom” but should it be?)

If you’re planning your honeymoon for right after your wedding, both events will feel rushed. You’ll spend your wedding worrying about your honeymoon and your honeymoon trying to recover from your wedding. Plus, the post-wedding blues may hit harder when you have all of your big events back to back. You’ll get back from your honeymoon and be left wondering, “Now what?” Instead, space them out so you can look forward to your honeymoon as you mourn the end of your wedding.

But don’t go on your honeymoon too late either!

On the other hand, waiting months (or even years!) after your wedding to go on your honeymoon can have its downsides too. While many couples prefer to wait to save up money (or wait out travel restrictions), it can feel less like a honeymoon if you’ve already been married for a while. There’s also a greater chance that you’ll never end up going on your honeymoon if you keep putting it off.

In my opinion, the sweet spot for going on your honeymoon is two weeks to two months after your wedding. That way, you can come down from your wedding high, take care of all the post-wedding tasks and have time to get excited and finish planning your honeymoon. You’ll still be in the newlywed stage but won’t feel like you’re rushing from one big event to the next.

We got married on September 19th and left for our honeymoon on October 10th. This was awesome as we had the week after our wedding to hang out with out-of-town guests who stuck around Vancouver and lots of time to still prep and pack for our trip.

Of course, not everyone is able to go on their honeymoon at the optimal time. With the pandemic, many couples had to cancel or postpone dream honeymoons. Other factors like budget, work schedules and childcare may dictate if and when you can go. So while a two week to two month post-wedding departure time is ideal, planning your honeymoon for the perfect time is not always possible.

Plan for some relaxation during your honeymoon

I find most couples planning a honeymoon go one of two ways: all relaxation or none at all. The “all relaxation” couples book a week at a beach resort with no plans other than to lie on a chair by the water. And while that sounds nice, it gets boring by day three. On the other hand, there are couples who want to hit the ground running, flying across the world and changing cities every couple of days to see as much as they can.

I completely understand both motivations. Your honeymoon is supposed to be a relaxing time for you and your spouse to connect after the busy-ness of your wedding. It’s also supposed to be a “once in a lifetime” trip where you make epic memories together.

My advice is to find the middle ground. You don’t want to feel like you wasted your honeymoon by doing nothing the whole time. And you also don’t want to feel like you need a vacation after your honeymoon because all you did was run around.

I suggest starting your honeymoon with a day or two of relaxation so you can get over jet lag, recover from wedding exhaustion and start your trip on the right foot. Then plan for some time to relax between big activities. A day of rock climbing followed by a morning massage. A late night Broadway show followed by breakfast in bed. It’s also nice to schedule a low-key day or two at the end of your trip so you can come back home feeling rested and refreshed.

We started off our honeymoon in Montreal, a city we’ve visited before, so there was less pressure to see and do everything. We were honestly only in Montreal to eat! We also planned our honeymoon so that we returned to Vancouver on a Saturday, giving us Sunday to rest (and do laundry!) before going back to work.

YOHO: You only honeymoon once

While YOHO can be a dangerous motto leading to extravagant upgrades and reckless decision making, I think when taken with a grain of salt, it can be a helpful tool for planning your honeymoon. After all, you only honeymoon once, so might as well make the most of it!

By keeping YOHO in mind during your honeymoon, it will encourage you to do things you don’t always do on vacation and take advantage of opportunities. Whether that’s saying yes to trying a new type of food, like insects, or booking something outside your comfort zone, like skydiving, this mindset will make your honeymoon feel unique and extra special.

And since it is your honeymoon, don’t be afraid to splurge a little. Of course, you should splurge within a budget you’ve both agreed to and not in a way that will jeopardize any of your other expenses or savings. But a little upgrade here and there is really nice!

A great way to help you afford some splurges during your honeymoon is to set up a Honeyfund for wedding gifts. Instead of guests giving you physical gifts, they can make monetary contributions towards your honeymoon. We did this for our wedding and it was such a hit! Guests could easily contribute to something they know we’ll love and enjoy without having to go shopping or take out cash (our Honeyfund accepted credit cards and PayPal). And we got to enjoy a few extra honeymoon splurges thanks to their generosity!

Should we go for the full lobster dinner in Charlottetown, PEI? Of course we should, YOHO!

Tell everyone it’s your honeymoon

While I stand by this advice, I will caution that you shouldn’t get your hopes up. Just because it’s your honeymoon doesn’t mean you’re going to get all the free things. Gone are the days when you could proudly proclaim, “It’s our honeymoon!” and expect to be upgraded to first class, given the presidential suite and have your dinner comped. Instead you may get a small discount, upgrade or perk – so adjust your expectations accordingly.

At the very least, you’ll get well wishes and great service, which is always nice!

If you’re uncomfortable telling people it’s your honeymoon in person, you can always include it in the reservation notes when booking a hotel, tour or restaurant meal online. That’s usually what we did. During our honeymoon, we received free champagne at one restaurant, an upgraded hotel room in another city, and lots of hearty congratulations. Letting people know that you’re celebrating has its perks!

You don’t have to be romantic 24/7 on your honeymoon

When you do a Google image search for honeymoon, you’ll see couples holding hands on the beach, kissing by the water and toasting champagne flutes while wearing giant fluffy robes. And while all of that sounds lovely, it can be a lot of pressure to keep up that level of romance 24/7.

Your honeymoon does not need to be traditionally romantic all of the time. Not every meal needs to be eaten by candlelight and you don’t need rose petals on the bed each night. You can even walk down a street and not hold hands if you don’t feel like it.

While all of that romance stuff can be nice, there is a lot of pressure on honeymoons to be super romantic all of the time. And the one thing that kills romance more than anything is pressure. So here is your permission to enjoy your honeymoon without any pressure, even if it looks nothing like a Google image search.

And if I can take it one step further: It’s okay to spend some time alone during your honeymoon. I’m a big advocate for solo travel and taking time to yourself on a trip, even if you have a partner. And yes, that extends to your honeymoon. I’m not saying you should get separate hotel rooms or go to different cities! I am saying that carving out a bit of alone time will only make your trip that much better.

When we arrived in Charlottetown, Colin and I had been on our honeymoon for 10 days and had 10 days still to go. After driving from New Brunswick to Prince Edward Island (and doing all of the driving on our trip!), Colin was exhausted. When we checked in, all he wanted to do was relax for a bit. But I was excited to explore a new city. I had never been to Prince Edward Island before, it was sunny and Charlottetown was calling my name.

So instead of forcing Colin to come explore with me, where he would have been grouchy and tired the whole time, or staying back in the hotel room with him, where I would’ve been bored and restless, we divided and conquered. Colin hung back in our room, played games on his phone and took a nap. I wandered downtown Charlottetown, bought a book at a used bookstore and read it in an adorable cafe. A few hours later, Colin was well-rested and eagre to join me. We had a lovely evening exploring more of Charlottetown and treated ourselves to a yummy dinner.

But do take advantage of being in the honeymoon phase

So while I don’t think your honeymoon needs to be champagne and bubble baths 24/7, I do think you should make the most of being in the romantic honeymoon phase. But remember that romance is in the eye of the beholder. We all have our own version of what romance is and you should embrace that on your honeymoon.

For some couples, romance is holding hands on the beach and for others it might be going on a hike, wandering through an art gallery, taking a cooking class or snuggling on the couch. For most couples, romance comes down to spending time together doing something that you both love.

After our first stop in Montreal, the rest of our honeymoon was a road trip through the Maritime provinces of Canada. We went to museums, ate great seafood, walked along waterfronts, checked out fall foliage on the Cabot Trail and learned a lot about Canada’s history. And sure, exploring an immigration museum or listening to a podcast on a road trip might not sound that romantic, but we were doing things we loved with the person we loved most. In my mind, that’s romance at its finest!

It’s also nice to make some time on your honeymoon to connect with one another. After all, the whole point of this trip is to celebrate your marriage! So take some time to reflect on your favourite parts of your wedding, talk about your future together or whisper sweet nothings into each other’s ears.

Make your honeymoon memorable

Your honeymoon is meant to be this once in a lifetime trip. And while I don’t agree with all of the pressure and focus we put on honeymoons, I do think your honeymoon should be a memorable experience. Your honeymoon doesn’t have to be the best trip you ever go on but it should be a really good one!

When planning your honeymoon, look out for ways that you can make it super special. Can you plan a surprise for your partner? Perhaps you can book a tour you know they’d love to go on or even surprise them with room service breakfast in bed one morning.

Is there something you can cross off the bucket list? Have you and your spouse always dreamed of doing something or going somewhere together? When Colin and I first started planning our honeymoon, we wanted to go to our ultimate bucket list destination: New Zealand. But since borders were closed, we chose something else on our bucket list: Road tripping along the Cabot Trail on Cape Breton Island!

Even something as simple as making reservations for special dinners can help make your trip more memorable. Some of our favourite moments from our honeymoon were the awesome meals we ate in the Maritimes at restaurants like Halifax’s The Bicycle Thief and Dartmouth’s The Canteen.

Bring home a special souvenir

This is one honeymoon planning tip I wish I had listened to before our honeymoon. I love the idea of picking up a special souvenir on your travels to place within your home. Every time you walk by it or use it, you’re flooded with fond memories of your honeymoon.

In fact, this is something I wish I had done through all of my travels. It would be so cool to have a house full of gorgeous items from all over the world! I’d love to be able to say, “Oh, I just picked that up in Morocco” when people ask where I got a beautiful leather pouf or Berber carpet.

But sadly, most of my travels have been done on a budget. And a budget means no money for souvenirs and no space in cramped carry-on bags to put them. Of course, we have picked up some souvenirs. We have an impressive collection of magnets on our fridge and a collage of postcards from every city that we visited while we lived in Prague. We have special Christmas ornaments too. And every time I pass one of our travel trinkets, I do smile thinking of my time in that place.

From our honeymoon, we brought back our usual magnets and postcards. But I wish we had splurged on something a bit more special for our home. Even a set of dish cloths or a small print to frame would have been very cool. So don’t make the same mistake I did: Bring home something special from your honeymoon!

Remember that you will travel again

The most important tip I want you to remember while planning your honeymoon is this: You will travel again. Your honeymoon is your first trip together as a married couple, it shouldn’t be your last.

I think part of the reason why there is so much pressure on honeymoons to be these epic, extravagant, expensive trips is because society treats them as once in a lifetime. I’ve heard so many couples who go all out on their honeymoon because it’s the only time in their life they’ll be able to get 2+ weeks off of work.

And while work/life balance and capitalist vacation policies are bigger fish to fry, I think a lot of it can come down to your mindset too. If you treat your honeymoon as your first married trip and not your only married trip, it relieves a lot of the pressure. It gives you future trips to look forward to and allows you to enjoy your honeymoon for what it is. It also allows you to prioritize travel in your marriage.

When we first started honeymoon planning, we dreamed of New Zealand. We then thought of honeymoons in France, Japan and New England before settling on Montreal and the Maritimes. At first, I was kind of disappointed. Here I am, a travel blogger known for epic trips around the world, and for my honeymoon I’m going on a domestic road trip. That’s it?

But it helped to remember that this isn’t the last or only trip my husband and I will ever go on. We’ve already been on so many epic trips together – like spending 3 weeks in Southeast Asia, 10 days in Ireland and almost a year living in Prague. And I know we’ll have so many more incredible trips to come (New Zealand, we will get to you one day!).

Knowing that, I was able to find peace with our decision. It helped me to appreciate all of the pros of travelling domestically in my home country. And I love that our honeymoon is unique! Instead of going to an all-inclusive resort or popular honeymoon spots like Hawaii or Paris, we road tripped through Cape Breton Island, fell in love with the sights in Halifax, saw Anne’s Green Gables in PEI and ate great food in Montreal!

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We had a blast on our honeymoon and I wouldn’t change a thing about it. And it has me even more excited for our next trip together! Where did you go on your honeymoon? Or if you were planning your honeymoon, where would you want to go? 

 

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